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For the past nine years I have lived a fairly solitary existence, save for the company of my daughter and small dog.
My daughter left to set up home with her boyfriend last June and I naturally found the house rather quiet after she had left and, although quite happy in my solitude, missed the usual female sounds, smells and general chatter around the house.
I live in a small one Pub village and having lived here for the past twenty years, see little opportunity of meeting or being attracted to a female companion of my age, or even 15 years either side of it. I could go 'Line Dancing' every Thursday evening at a nearby village hall, but do not think that the wearing of cowboy boots and rhinestone regalia would enhance my standing as a must have stud, or indeed would make my heart palpitate at the sight of various matrons in cowboy hats strutting their stuff in unison. I am sure its a lovely pastime and am not denigrating it - its just not my bag.
Basically, at 61 there are very few social opportunities in which to meet someone of the opposite sex, who is unmarried, of a similar age and has a similar outlook upon life, particularly if you live in a hotbed of peace and tranquility such as I do.
The Internet has changed all that. There is a bewildering array of social networking sites and on-line dating agencies which cover literally everything for all tastes, orientation, creed, age, et al. For me, the important one is age because my generation were in their late forties when the Internet exploded onto the scene and have had to adapt to the new technology rather than having been brought up with it. For most adults of my age this meant, amongst other things, learning to type and in a lot of cases - the alphabet. I wondered if there would be enough candidates with a grasp of this technology to enable a choice. Fears allayed in following paragraphs.
I really took pot luck on which agency to choose, so plumbed for what seemed to be a fairly straight forward outfit, catering for the over fifties and majoring on friendship and dating as apposed to others offering instant sex and/or guaranteed marital bliss for ever after. I thought I would try it for free, but soon realized that you cannot open or access mail, in its various forms, unless you sign up and pay for full membership.This is not a con as whilst free, you get ample opportunity to wander around the site and get a feel for it, and other members who are interested in your photographs and profile can let you know that they are, but you cannot respond until you pay up. So I paid up - no problem, Its less than 25p a day and a lot more fun than half a pint of milk!
Initially I was astounded at the sheer number of ladies on the site that matched my search criteria and resided within a 50 mile radius of my own dwelling. I took a compass to a map and transcribed a circle upon it and was amazed at the number of major conurbations that it encompassed, and this also included a large chunk of the North Sea. Not wishing to be greedy, my search radius is now 25 miles, still 50 miles between the borders of my territory - I felt power and conquest surging through my veins!
I wont go through the do's and don'ts of building your profile, there are numerous good articles on this and the site gives you excellent advise anyway. I will just suggest that you are honest, because you are going to arrange to meet someone in the flesh at some stage, but if you describe oneself as 6 foot and have a profile photo taken in the distant past, but you are actually 5' 6" and now have an exceedingly wide parting in your hair, you will fail. Similarly with the ladies, describing oneself as medium build then getting stuck in a carver on the date, will lead nowhere. My profile is a little down beat, for example I rejected all of the photographs that my daughter thought would be good and chose one that I felt did not do me any favours but age accurate. Its nice to get a compliment like 'you're taller than I imagined' or 'your photograph doesn't do you justice', its a great start and It is also gratifying to be able to return a compliment.
Even with all the modern communication wizardry at my disposal, I found the telephone to be the most satisfying medium, both to get a better feeling for the type of person you are interested in, and also to arrange dates and meetings. I know it is not advised, but I have been quite liberal in giving out my number but leaving it up to the recipient as to if and when they reciprocate. I have had no problems with this method and have enjoyed many a good chin wag during these long winter evenings.
On-line dating has been a very pleasant experience for me and am fairly close to establishing a permanent bond with someone I have met on-line. Strangely enough, she was the very first person who sent me a wink, and although we have both dated other members, it looks like we may be leaving the site soon to pursue our romance.
The big story though, is this.If nothing else, on-line dating sites provide companionship, friendship and company when you want it. You do not feel so alone and there is always someone out there who will have an on-line chat with you, or to write an email to, and of course, love to go on a date for some real live company. The bonus is meeting someone you would never have found otherwise. Find a site, join up and have fun!
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