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Thinking about live musicians for your wedding? It's a great idea. Did you know we hear live music in a different part of our brain than we hear recorded music and that it is more calming than recorded? If you can, why not choose that option? (Disclaimer, I knew this before I fell in love with and married a drummer!) However, choosing musicians for your wedding is not as straightforward as you might think. Weddings are very different from clubs. There's a lot you want your wedding musicians to do that they don't need to do at a club. The musicians, particularly at the reception have the PA system, so they're in charge. They need to know the wedding flow so that they can play the right music kinds of music in the right places. There are essentially three places you want music at your wedding and here are some things you might want to consider as you look at all of them.
The Ceremony: Depending where your ceremony is, there may be restrictions as to what kind of music and what kind of musicians you may have. If you're being married in a church, they often like you to use their musician (and there's usually an extra charge for this if you're not a member. If you are a member and there's no charge, it's good form to tip.)
- You have all sorts of options for your music choices. The classics are great, but so are songs that are meaningful in your life.
- You have all sorts of options for musicians. I've heard the Grateful Dead played on a mighty Wurlitzer and the Stones by a string quintet. Classical guitar, harp: You're limited by the venue and a musician's flexibility.
- You have options for how you use your music. Unless you're very accustomed to music, be careful about using it in the midst of your ceremony. Brides and Grooms' nerves can overcome them if they're not actively involved. Songs are long! I often have to encourage the bridal pair to stay centered and engaged during music and readings. So consider carefully what your comfort zones are.
The Cocktail Hour
: You usually want quiet listening music here. Although I know several brides who have wanted sing-alongs for the holiday season. Financially, you'll do best if you hire the same musicians to play at your cocktail hour who played at your ceremony. The first hour is the most expensive, but adding an hour often doesn't cost that much. You may also want to have one or two of your reception musicians show up early and provide the music you're looking for.
The Reception: Playing a wedding reception and playing it well takes talent and affinity for working a party.
- You want music for the entire four (or so) hours of your reception.
- You want music that's appropriate to the activity it's supporting: No rock-n-roll during dinner and no dinner music when you're looking to cut a rug!
- You want musicians who understand the flow of the party and who can follow the instruction sheet. Nothing's worse than omitting the father of the bride speech (unless it's omitting the mom's!)!
- You want musicians who are all about you. This isn't a concert; it's a wedding. (OK, there was a big San Francisco wedding where they flew in Elton John and his 2 baby grands. But then it wasn't a wedding, it was an extravaganza!)
Your venue, vendors, wedding planner and talent agencies will be your best bets for finding the right music and giving you good guidance on the fees. What you'll spend will depend on the area you live in, the quality of the musicians and training they have as event bands.
Bottom Line?: Give your relationship the chance it deserves to succeed wildly, against all odds! After all, you deserve it. Your relationship deserves it! And now I'd like to invite you to sign up to receive 2 free templates for creating the wedding ceremony of your dreams, the wedding vows of your heart and the marriage of a lifetime: http://annkeelerevans.org/weddings/free
The Rev. Ann Keeler Evans - helping you move from "I do" to happily and healthily ever after!
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